Seen On Taft Avenue [PSA-cum-Anecdote]

Some random Taft Avenue photo. Credit on image itself.

I finally saw one of those you-bumped-me-now-pay-me scammers in action. I absolutely would've wanted to take some visual evidence of some sort, but alas, I was kinda slow to take my iPod out and the bus kept moving.

And no, I didn't really want to alight because I had an absolutely good seat, which I won't be able to get if I got on the bus from that area.

So I'll just try my best to put the scenario in words.

The incident occurred along Taft Avenue, near the T.M. Kalaw intersection. The time, around 8 P.M. The traffic was somewhat slow, but moving steadily. A man with long, unkempt hair wearing a ubiquitous barangay basketball league jersey and shorts walked from the sidewalk towards the center island holding some plastic bag. I don't really want to deal in stereotypes, but if it helps the narrative, the guy looked like a drifter who hadn't washed in days.

The particular section of Taft where the drifter crossed wasn't at all an intersection, so I had figured that he'd probably make camp on the center island, which is a usual occurrence along Taft Avenue. Normal evening thus far. The drifter then stopped crossing the road one lane before he reached the center island. He waited until a sedan crossed in front of him and then he bumped himself into the car.

Well, not a direct bump. He took one of the worst dives this side of Fernando Torres. Essentially he tapped the car with his hand and exaggerated a fall.

Kinda like this. (Credit: The Chive)

 And get this - he "hit" the rear end. With the car moving forward.

The car naturally stopped because its driver seemed to be a decent fellow, even though he can't ever be at fault in the whole scenario even if the bump was legit.

As for the drifter, he stood up and picked up his plastic bag. He took a look at his plastic bag, and noticing that it pretty much remained intact, he ripped the plastic bag open and dumped its contents (which curiously looked like sand) on the road, probably his guise to get the driver to pay up.

But seriously, the contents looked like sand.

"Bayaran mo yung brown sugar na natapon!" Sosyal si kuya. (Credit: Mott Community College)

The drifter then moved over to the driver's window and that's the last image I saw as the bus kept moving forward.

If not for the scam, the whole scenario looked like some genius slapstick comedy routine. The scammer is probably new to the trade, which is why his whole routine is a mess.

That said, it's still important to know that there are a myriad of scammers up and about the metro, and it looks like "Manila's Finest" are over-matched by sheer numbers and lack of equipment and personnel. So yeah, take care. If someone bumps your car and you know you're in the clear, just go.

I can't tell you how infuriating it is that about all anyone can tell you is to "take care". I mean, yes, it's always important to take care, but some real arrests and punitive measures, as well as actually improving the police force, are very much welcome in keeping crime down and generally making the metropolis safer.

And from another perspective, it's saddening to note that because of these scammers, we're being forced away from good moral behavior (stopping to check on bumped pedestrians) into more inhumane actions (essentially hit-and-run) just so we can ensure our own safety.

I really do wish there were more Dutertes to go around.